Friday, June 10, 2011

Top 10 Mistakes Guys Make When Trying To Get A Girl

1) Wearing the same clothes

B: No… I don’t mean rocking the same gear every day… I mean dressing up the same way as the guy next to you… and the guy next to him… and the guy next to him…….
See, unfortunately, everybody had the same idea you had and went to the mall and bought the exact same shirt. So… Instead of indicating that you’re aware of the fashion trends, you’re indicating that you’re a drone. You have no personal style. Everybody knows that when someone else dictates to you that you should wear something different, that’s what you’re gonna do. No good.

Figure out stuff that YOU like to wear and that YOU look good in and that represents who YOU are as a person, and make up your own style. Separate yourself from the pack. Be that ONE GUY that the chicks want to ask where you shop instead of knowing off the bat from the second you walk in the door with your pack of croanies that look exactly the same as you do.
L: Clothes not only define a person’s personality, but also makes them memorable. At least if you hit it off with a girl, she can remember you by “that guy that was wearing the red and white striped pants” instead of “that guy with the hair”
B: So Funny! :D That happens all the time! “Remember Lisa from Jon’s party?” “Jeans or Skirt?” “Skirt” “Black or Blue” “Black” “The one with the…” “Yeah, Her” “Yeah… What about her?” :D

2) Not having anything in common with her

B: Major Mistake. Major. Choosing a chick to be your girlfriend just because you enjoy hitting it. Is there any other reason TO choose a girlfriend? no. :D However, eventually, you’re going to get bored of tapping it for the gazillionth time, or she’s gonna get out of shape. In either case, you’ll suddenly experience an increase in the time you spend NOT having sex with her. This is where you’ll realize that you have nothing in common with her other than sex and start looking for your way out of the relationship (unless she gets back in shape, in which case, all bets are off! :D ).
Do yourself a favor and make sure you have things in common with your girl so that you can still have a good time with her during “the off season”. Maybe you both like video games. Maybe you both enjoy eating out @ the different restaurants in your town. Maybe you both enjoy watching MMA fights. If so… make sure she knows Jiu-Jitsu so you can kick her ass and she can take it…. um… or maybe she’ll kick YOUR ass for stepping to her sideways! :D
L: VERY TRUE! And like I said before, things in common that don’t count: breathing, eating, showering (and if it does, get the hell outta there), walking, etc… you get the point, right?

3) Bragging about what you have / own
B: The only reason a chick’s going to be impressed by what you own is if she doesn’t feel like she can get that for herself. This is fine, if you’re trying to get on for the One Night Stand, but really poor technique if you’re trying to pull a chick for a Long Term Relationship.
You don’t want a chick to chill with you so she can lamp on your yacht. You don’t want her to show up to parties with you because you’re about to sell your startup. You don’t want a chick befriending you because you’re internet famous and hooking up with you’s going to drastically improve her google ranking.
At the same time… How lame IS IT that when you have a chance to tell her about yourself as a person, the best things you can say for yourself are generic things that like a million other guys are doing every day? Everybody gets money. Everybody has a form of transportation… Even if that’s just a MetroCard. Tell chicks what makes you DIFFERENT from the other guys, not what makes you SIMILAR, and thus INTERCHANGEABLE with other guys.
L: Bill is absolutely right on this one. Talking about the stuff you have not only makes you sound conceited, but it makes her think that you are so boring you have to brag about yourself. And that’s going to attract one kind of girl: GOLD DIGGERS. If you’re OK with that, why not just walk around the street handing out $100 bills? Oh and let’s just say one day you get old, ugly, fat and there’s someone else out there more popular than you (and younger) – your chick is gonna head straight for that guy because there’s nothing substantial about you except your rank, which is shot to shit – and money – which is long gone spent on her. She needs a new sugar daddy.

4) Meeting chicks in bars

B: Do NOT meet chicks in bars. :( You know what kinds of chicks you meet in bars?….. Chicks that go to bars.
What’s the problem with that? Nothing, if you’re just trying to get on. If you’re looking for a girlfriend, choose one that does something CONSTRUCTIVE with her time. If she’s at the bar, tipping a glass back @ 3:30am, she’s NOT in the gym @ 7am staying in shape. Capisce? :D Go pick up chicks at the book store. That way, you know she’ll probably be READING in the middle of the night while you’re studying for your law degree instead of drinking her ass off at some bar and giving it up to the next man. :D
L: yeah, girls that meet guys at bars are classy. real classy. Let me tell you, fellow – you got yourself a real winner there. Just don’t be crying to me when your beer goggles fade away and you got yourself a coyote ugly the next morning.

5) Not checking out her moms

B: The FIRST THING you want to do if you’re considering keeping a chick is check out her moms! :D
If you see your [pending] girlfriend’s mother, and she’s still fine as hell, and you’re like “If I weren’t dating her daughter, she could GET IT!”, then she probably passed those good genes to your girl and you can look forward to another 25 years of feeling like plastering that. Also, if your girl’s moms is COOL AS HELL, like you wouldn’t be surprised to see her with her hand up in the air at a club, shakin’ her groove thang, you know she probably brought her daughter up to be cool also.
Just don’t overdo it on the moms thing, or you might end up on The Maury Show. :D
L: Totally, looks wise, definitely look at the mom. She may look good now… but you can never tell what she’ll look like when she’s older and her mom is that insight to the future.

6) Lame pickup lines

L: If you have to resort to using lame pickup lines, then congratulations, you’re a huge DOUCHEBAG and I hope you feel good about yourself. You’re the guy that the girl talk about when they hang out with their friends. “Remember that lame douchebag from the bar? yeah, he used a pickup line on me. He’s such a loser. I’m telling all my friends” (oops, you’re screwed!).
I think my favorite pick up line is, “Hey, have you met my friend *Ted.” Pause. Me thinking, “How the hell would I have met your lame friend. If I knew him, I would say hi to him, right?” Then response, “Uh, no you’re lame. Bye”.
B: hehehe Yeah, if you’re going to use lines, make sure they’re over the top. Go Big or Go Home! :D Make them so bad that she has to laugh at how corny your line was and gives you humor points instead of subtracting cool points.

7) Buying an incessant amount of drinks for the girl

L: This says 1 thing. One – I am so ugly that I have to get this girl shitfaced so she thinks I look hot then maybe I’ll have a chance to get in her pants. She’s thinking – wow this guy thinks I’m going to hook up with him after he’s buying me all these drinks. I know he’s just trying to make me think he looks good. Too late, I already saw what he looks like.
Girls don’t like guys who they think are desperate and they can easily obtain. Girls like a chase. They like someone who won’t buy them drinks all the time and who will maybe insinuate that they get a drink or two bought for them. This isn’t bad manners, it’s fair and not so out of the blue anymore. It’s the 21st century – let the girls take charge sometime.
B: Oh Man! hahaha Let this be a lesson to you, fellaz! Only buy a lot of drinks for…. girls that have already consumed a lot of drinks!!! :D (lol @ “too late… I already saw what he looks like”, hahahaha)
As far as getting her to buy you drinks, that’s probably a good policy if you intend to date her long-term. If she can’t buy you a $5 beer, that means she’s BROKE. If she’s broke NOW, she’s going to be EVEN MORE BROKE in the future as cost-of-living increases faster than the minimum wage. She’s gonna be EVEN STILL MORE BROKE if you don’t keep your condom game tight and she has a kid offa you. :(
So… Yeah… Get her to get you a drink every now and then so you can check if “Sisters are doin’ it for themselves”! :D

8) Being rude to her friends

L: Boy, this one is a no-brainer. If the girl is on the fence over whether she likes you or not, she’s going to immediately consult her group of close girl friends. If you’re rude to them, they will sway her in the direction out of your favor and you’re history. This is why: You’re too new to the girl for her to believe you over her friends. You’re not someone she can completely trust yet, so your good intentions to her will be quickly overlooked if her friend says, “wow that guy is a jerk. Guess what he said to me.”
In some cases you may have not even been rude, you just gave off a bad vibe and immediately her friend say to her, “Stay away, I have a bad feeling.” In most (not all) cases, the girl will completely dismiss you even though you haven’t been that bad to her. Why? Who know, but it happens. Chicks before dicks.
B: hahahaha OMG! Lindz has an excellent point here. This is why you want to make sure to steer clear of ALL of a chick’s friends….. until you Tap That Azzzz! :D
After that, you can do what you want… be rude to her friends… kick it to her sister… Her judgement will be completely JACKED since you’re now “the one” and can do no wrong! :D

9) Talking about previous relationships

L: The last thing a girl wants to hear is about your last ex and how you were in love with her but she broke your heart – or whatever the situation is. She’s trying to get to know YOU, not your ex. Plus, bringing up previous flames will ignite more and more questions. Why did she break up with you. Is he comparing me to her? How do I compare?
You’ll want to talk about yourself and leave out anything involving other girls when you first meet her – even if the girl is strictly platonic. Just to make sure you avoid jealousy. Plus, bad mouthing other girls and exes in front of the new girl gives an insight onto the kind of person you are. It’s like an interview – you never badmouth your old boss, no matter what kind of a jerk he was!
B: Absolutely. It’s not about the past. It’s about the present and the future. Like she said, you can’t win by talking your ex UP or talking your ex DOWN, so leave her out, entirely. :D If your new chick is just crazy nosey (or just crazy) and insists on hearing what happened to your ex, have a good story prepared… Something like your ex girl, whom you met in a bar, overdid it with the drinking one night and accidentally stumbled into a recruitment station and signed up for a 20-year bid with the Army……. in Zimbabwe.

10) Not keeping your word

L: If you meet a girl for the first time and get her number and say you’re gonna call, then don’t, then forget any sort of future chances with her. If you can’t even keep your word on calling her, then how do you expect her to think you’ll keep your word on the first day and not stand her up. First impressions are a huge deal breaker so make sure you are up front and honest with her. If you take her number and can’t get together for 2 weeks, at least call her to let her know you enjoyed meeting her.
B: This is another good reason not to meet women in bars. Depending on how much YOU drank that night, word or no word, hahaha you might not remember meeting her AT ALL!!! :D coughanniecough But yeah, there are a lot of guys that see getting numbers as an END and not a MEANS. It’s more like “just in case” rather than an actual intention to call the chick, because you probably got numbers the day before and the weekend before that as well. Asking for a gal’s number doesn’t push her to the head of the list to get a call, but if you SAID you were going to get in touch with her, you really should make some attempt to reach out to her. The most important aspect of ANY relationship is TRUST. If you blow your credibility, you’re toast.
The way around this is to make sure you TRADE NUMBERS instead of just getting HER number. That way, you easily counter “You didn’t call me! :( ” with “YOU didn’t call ME! :D “
Lindz & Bill
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